Jade, the equivalent
by Belledonner
Summary: Edward is stopped from killing his father at the last minute, by a girl who claims to be his half sister? they may look similar, they may be both have the same tempers and vertically challenged ways but with all this in common...they still don't get along
1. Chapter 1

Jade, the equivalent.

AN: Okay look, I tried, I really did, but I am completely unable to right anything remotely fluffy! My last story 'forget me knots' turned from a romantic comedy into a incredibly dark toucher/action and this one was supposed to start completely different too! But it went all dark and poisonous, and whenever I try to change it hisses and snaps at me and gets all scary looking till I leave it alone.

My faults its dark, but you cant say I didn't try to lighten the mood!

And I will promise I will try to make it a little lighter.

Disclaimer; look mate; I don't even own the DVD's (if you can believe it I have only seen the first half of the series too) and if you honestly think my righting is good enough to be actual FMA material…then you're off your nutter!

Check ya later

Belledonner

* * *

"Don't you dare hurt him!"

"Who the fuck are YOU to say I cant kill this basted who destroyed my family?" Edward screamed in the direction of the disembodied voice, his automail blade pressing against the tender jugular of his Hohenheim's throat.

" Jade," the old man croaked, his eyes flickering to the side, "help me Jade, will you let this child destroy your only family? Do you believe what he is saying?"

Edwards's blade dug further into the skin, blood trickling off its edge and running down the weathered skin of Hohenheim's neck.

"I want to see you beg me for forgiveness, I want to see you at my mercy for what you did to mama." Edward growled.

"I said don't hurt him." The voice was deadly calm, slightly husky and strangely familiar to Edwards's ears, like a voice he heard everyday.

"And since when is it your choice what I do to my own bastard father?"

"Your father?" the voice gave a soft chuckle, " Ha, he gave you up like he gave up Alphonse and the bitch that betrayed us. The only person who deserves to use that title is me." The husky voice was filled with fiery passion swimming beneath an ice like calm. Still the voice held a familiarity that buzzed on the edge of Edwards's consciousness.

"What are you? Some sort of fucking homunculus? I don't know who the hell you are, but STOP TOYING WITH ME! My 'father' never had any other children besides me, Alphonse and Envy, and I sorted out the last one." Ed chuckled, blood running down the blade and pooling on the floor, soaking through his boots and staining them dark red.

"Wrong, little one, and on more than one point; but then again I never really expected you to remember your darling older half sister." The voice purred.

A sudden motion caused Edward to whirl on his heals, slapping Hohenheim across the face and sending him to the ground in the process.

A lithe body spun out of the shadows, a blur of purple sprinting and flipping under an archway and jumping onto the banister of the crumbling staircase, using the momentum to then swing round onto the landing above. Ed watched as the purple coat swirled around and launched itself from the landing, tumbling through the air and giving the impression of a controlled fall as the body flew towards him. Edward dropped to a crouch only a moment to late, his hands clapping together and forming the blade back to his arm, slowing down his drop to the ground. In a flash of cloth a pale hand whipped out and grabbed the back of his coat, wrenching him backwards into the flight of the purple clad person. Strong legs wrapped their way around his shoulders and arms around his head. He tried to stay Balanced, wobbling as the person latched onto his shoulders, one hand was currently yanking upwards on his chin while the other hand came down in a fast ark to connect with his shoulder, then the whole world went blank.

He woke to a sharp slap across the face.

Then another.

Then a punch to the gut that could have given Armstrong a run for him money, Ed curled onto his side as he culched at his stomach and attempted to throw up everything he had ever eaten.

A sharp kick to his side by a steel caped shoe had him clutching at what must be a broken rib.

Then long fingers wound their way into his hair and yanked him to standing.

"It's all your fucking fault!" the young woman in front of him fumed.

_Slap._

He looked at her, and then remembered the pain she had inflicted on him, looked at her again, and then almost burst out laughing, almost. She must have seen a slight smirk grace his face because soon it was wiped off.

_Backhand._

_Slap._

_Punch_

_Knee-jerk._

Ed was sure his nose was broken but paid no recognition, he was practically shaking with relief that the knee that had flew at him had only just missed parts of him he was rather attached too.

She was shorter than him –not that he was short or anything…-With massive amounts of curly dark gold hair that famed a face that he could have called a mirror image of his own if not to a few obviously feminine changes; her eyes were more slanted with long lashes and thin eyebrows that where pulling together in her anger, she had more prominent cheekbones and fuller lips.

The only major noticeable difference between them where their eyes; where Ed's where a rich gold, the girls where a deep green streaked through in one spot on her right eye with gold.

She looked an awful lot like him, she had none of the soft features that Trisha and al had, and without the baby fat still lingering like Ed. She also had hardness in her eyes that spoke of experiences that even he had never been through, and hoped he never would.

_Round house kick._

_Punch._

_Scratch._

"I wish I could just kill you now!" she screamed into his face, that calm ice-like facade crumbling in the wake of her fury. Edward flinched back from the white teeth that snapped shut a bear centimetre from his face, almost tumbling to the ground, the only thing holding him upright was her fingers wound painfully through his hair.

"Then why don't you? Huh? You could kill me now, and you know what? I wouldn't even hold it against you, because I have done every fucking thing I promised myself I would do, can you say the same? Is being the old mans pet called a life experience? Wow you must be god fucking damned good at alchemy for him to take you and leave the rest of his family! I spent my entire fucking life fixing the things that bastard you call a father screwed up! He destroyed my life, and you know what? In my eyes, he killed my mother. And from my own stupid mistakes and that bastards journals did me and Al try and bring her to life, and that turned out just swell didn't it? Yes-sir-ree it ended with my brother in a fucking suit of armour and the loss of my limbs. And I can and will blame that all on that son-of-a-bitch. So why don't you just kill me now?"

"Can I join your pity party or is it a private function?" Edward saw the deep green eyes darken further as she sneered at him. "Because you seem to think that I am somehow responsible for my step mothers death. Witch I am not, even if I wish I were. And for the record shrimp, I can't do alchemy."

Edward was starting to panic; the situation was finally catching up with him; where was he? Why did they look so similar? If this bitch, claiming to be his sister was for real –and this would answer the question about their resemblance-, then why hadn't his mother ever mentioned anything? Why the hell was she with Hohenheim? And where the hell was said mentiond basted?

And of course the one thing running through his mind that was not a question happened to be this; wow, looks like the..er…virticaly chalanged jeans run in the family then (excluding al, he was just naturaly frekish)…as dose the temper… but this thought had a voice anoyingly like Roy Mustang's, and therefore was studiously ignored.

" What, did you fuck the bastard or something? Cause all I have ever seen Hohenheim keep people around him for is for their power. And how the hell can you say that about my mother when you left her to die? You just whent along with the old man and left two kids to look after themselves and an sick mother too!" Ed ranted, the venom driping off every silable,

no longer caring that he was taking out his rage for his father out on his suposedly half sister.

"fuck my own father? Get your brain outa the gutter Edward! Fucking hell! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME! Neither did that bitch of a mother, for all she cared I could have run off to join the circus. Ever wondered why she never told you about me ed?" she asked, asthough reading his mind. "it was because she diddnt care! All that mattered was that she got her two alchemy protege boys, she diddnt care that she had a baby girl that came with he husband too. No, but father cared, he saw the potential that the bitch ignored! AND HE TOOK ME AWAY FROM YOU SO I COULD HAVE A BETTER LIFE!"

"so do you think it was any better? Trailing after that bastared like a lost puppy? Oh and by the way; you were right, mother never so much as wispered your name. And what was that by the way? Hmmm, slut, bitch? Am I getting close? Whore?…"

"Jade, that's my name. But I gotta tell ya ed, you have disapointed me greatly," she shook her mane of wiled hair, " for someone as suposedly intelegent as you, that you still failed to see through mothers lies amazes me!"

"And from someone from such a intelligent family, it surprises me that you would willingly follow that two faced basted!"

"Who the fuck said it was willing Edward? Oh I remember…it was you, not me! I may have hated your mother, but that doesn't mean I liked father any more than she. He just gave me the attention I craved, that is until I realized you never wanted me and that I would never belong in that 'happy' little family bubble your mother had created for you and Alphonse, leaving me with the choice of being ostracized from my family, or leaving when dad gave me the choice. And then I loved dad, when he gave me a choice that no one else would, for something that would actually benefit ME"

" So I am giving you another choice; kill me now, or let me live." Edwards's husky voice was angry but calm.

"As much as I would love to, I literally cant. A slight cost to me when I left you, Alphonse and your mother, father linked us, as a sort of…tracker? But I has its down sides; you die I die. So therefore we come to a second round of choices don't we _brother_?"

Edward spat bile that was lingering in his throat, and said the only thing one could say in his situation; "crap"

"Deep doo doo." she widened her eyes and spread her fingers, "as I see it this is the first option; I take you hostage and travel till I find my father again, get him to take off the tracker and kill you, -I really like that option personally-," she checked off on her fingers, "second; I kill you now, -not a personal favourite because it consequences my own death-. Fourth; you take me too meet my baby brother and I crash at your place till you can figure out how to take of the alchemy tracker or I find a way to find dad, -that's probably the winner if you ask me-. Or last but not least; I could join the military and help out dads homunculi that we both know are hidden within the ranks, -that would not be my first choice, because; a) homunculi deaths are messy, B) I have a supposedly short temper and C) father doesn't like it when I kill Dante's minions." Jade shrugged and pouted slightly as though from personal experience.

"You forgot number three." Edward pointed out, "and I say that number three should be where you go to some country far, far away and leave me in peace!"

"Again, I cant. If I don't return to father with you or proof that you are dead, envy said that he would see to it personally that I arrived on the other side of the gate. And if I don't return at all and father finds out I am not with you then dante will probably set lust or pride on me." Another shrug.

"Fine, but no guarantees that there will be enough room in the dorm, and if anyone finds out, you're on you own. And by the way, I killed envy" Edward sighed, wait a sec…when did he go from trying to kill Jade to offering her his room?

"No you didn't, that was a doll, but good job anyway, I watched the whole thing and I gotta say it was very entertaining!" Jade grinned, bounced on the spot, looked like she was about to hug and punch him at the same time but opted instead for a hard pat on the back that knocked the breath out of him and left him stumbling forwards on to his face, and this was the obvious safer option of the two.

"In that case," her voice changed and softened a bit, but her brilliant green eyes glared down on him, "nice to see you bro, haven't seen you since you were like this big," she made a motion about knee hight, then winked," but then again you haven't changed that much."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO UNDER-GROWN THAT A BABY COULD STEP ON HIM AND SQUISH HIM INTO A THOUSAND TINY ED SIZED PIECES??…" The rant continued in such a fashion till ed calmed down enough to notice a downfall in her teasing, he sneered," you look more like a midget baby sister than a older one your pretending to be anyway so you cant say nothing bout hight, o' vertically challenged one!" if this is what it feels like to tease someone about a sore subject its no wonder mustang teases me so much… Edward thought as he watched the girl above him turn red with anger.

Jade drew herself up to her full hight –about up to Ed's eyebrows- and began a rant that not only beat her brothers but also caused dogs five blocks down to start howling and a small avalanche 10,000km away.

* * *

AN: TA-DA!!

Watch think?

Well if you want to see more of Jade…well needless to say, you review I will type! –ah nothing like the smell of bribery in the morning!-

So I shall Wright more! (that is if I can find the motivation –reviews- to keep righting!)

Check ya later

Belledonner


	2. Chapter 2

"And this is the grand palace of the compound." Said Edward with a flourish, a grunt and 'accidental' stamp of a heavy metal foot as he shoved roughly passed jade.

"Hum, wow, its lived up to all my expectations," she smirked and thrust ed into a wall with one arm while the other the edge of the door and slammed it hard in Edwards face as she passed through the shaking door frame.

"Brother is that you?" a voice drifted from inside the sparsely decorated apartment.

" Actually I think the preferred term is 'sister' but I am unfortunately if you ever call me such or any of the names your _darling_ little brother has called me you will have the displeasure of seeing your balls eye to eye, so to speak, before they are forcefully pushed down your throat." Jade said absentmindedly as she strode down the narrow featureless hall towards a break in the wall where came Alphonse's voice. She chuckled as the muffled protests of Edward screamed at Al not to go near her and that he WAS NOT SHORT! And the curious reply coming from the room just a few steps away. " I will give you a run for your money Riza Hawkeye." She muttered as an after statement.

Just as she was rounding the corner she heard a loud clap and thump as a door was thrown off its hinges, then something cold and very hard impacted with her cheek, and something very heavy barrelled into her in a flash of gold and red.

Jade grunted and twisted around so that the fur ball that was Edward was now on top of her, then flexed her feet witch were propped on his stomach, Edward saw the position they were in and his eyes widened as his automail froze in its momentum to crush her face. Jade wriggled her toes and cackled slightly, her green eyes blazing manically, then before Edward could scramble for cover, jade catapulted him high into the air, her legs springing her to standing in the blink on an eye and fly kicking the still airborne Edward straight into the living room and crashing down into a kitchen sink on the far side of the room in the tiny kitchen-et.

"brother! What do you think your doing?! You cant hit a girl!" said al coming up behind jade an putting a restraining hand on her shoulder. " you could have seriously hurt her! Now go and help her out of the sink"

"WHAT?!" the elder siblings screamed at the same time

" I AM NOT A GIRL AL!! And neither is she!"

"Sure about that are you? On both counts? Because I am pretty sure I can prove I am female, you on the other hand might find it a little harder to convince anyone you are infact male."


End file.
